Women

Women are complex creatures, it has been said before. Though I belong to the club I will forever be perplexed by the way we do things. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a woman; I was trying to wear nylons and lipstick before I could spell, but what I didn’t know was that womanhood is a race and sometimes we race for each other while other times we push one another down… it just depends on what time of the month it is. I have never understood that about us.

To be honest, I almost passed up my best friend because I was threatened by her. She did everything I did, but better and I just couldn’t have that. Well, it wasn’t worth the fight, she’s too wonderful and I gave in. I have thought about that a few times… what if I would of resisted being her friend out of pride and missed out on our kindred friendship, what a shame that would have been.

As a woman I feel that I understand women, but there is one thing I will never understand and maybe I don’t want to. Women as a sex are amazing. The women that I know, and I know a lot, are women to admire, some have even become my goal. By goal I mean that I have been lucky enough to know women who make me want to be better, women I look at and say “I hope I can be like her someday”. I have always been rooting for the girls. In me there is a tiny feminist and a big cheerleader for the women’s team. Because aren’t we a team…. I mean really aren’t we?

So the thing that I will never understand is why we just can’t be friends? I’m not talking bosom buddies, kindred spirits, or B.F.F’s to the end; I’m just talking about being happy for one another. Is it too much to ask that another woman’s accomplishment not be our failure? Can we just say “good for you, one more point for the girls team”?

Dearest Twenty Eleven

This last year was quite eventful… for me anyway. If someone else were to look in at my life it might seem dull, mundane, messy, frugal… and full of sippy cups, diapers and some runny noses. I found it full of life and excitement, yet still full of sippy cups and diapers. In 2011 we moved to a town we said we would never move to and when we did, we thought it was temporary, but to our surprise we fell in love with this crazy little town. This place has the best rodeo ever and even decorates for Christmas with sparkly spurs! Now we aren’t official Cowboys yet, though I was tempted to buy all the cute cowgirl clothes, but we love the people and the feeling that we are where we are supposed to be. In this last year, our Dylan turned two and has kept me busy. He started talking (when it suits him), he met Buzz Light year and got to know his sister who he simply calls “baby”. Though he is tough on “baby” I see his love for her. When I am not looking he feeds her, pats her head and gives her toys to play with. Noel turned one, started walking, started eating everything she could get her tiny hands on and basically melted Corbet’s heart into a soupy puddle. Noel changed the parenting game for us. If the person who names hurricanes is looking for a good “N” name, I have an idea for them.


In 2011 Corbet learned that he is in fact not too old to change careers and even follows his dream of writing a book. As far as our marriage goes… in December it was our sixth year anniversary! We had dinner plans that were foiled by our kids, but we put them to bed and sat on the couch just happy to be together. It’s still love, we still get excited to see each other at the end of the day and we laugh so much that we forget we’re broke. How it keeps getting better… I just don’t know.

I even learned some things about myself in 2011. I learned that I still love to write and that I have a voice in the matter of mothering. Mothering for now is my canvas and I am happy to create the best life I can for my children. I have learned that mothering is not forever and when my kids are gone and grown I better be able to look at myself and know who I am… even apart from being a mom. I am still a woman with opinions, intellect and well, a little attitude. I have learned that I better keep up on myself because no one else is going to and I am worth it. I have also learned that I NEED my husband to help me with the kids, but when he is at work and we don’t see him for days… I can do it by myself. I can take my kids to church by myself and when I see Dylan is missing his dad I can even get on the floor and wrestle for a while. I can get a chair when I can’t reach something and use a drill and remember to take out the garbage on Tuesdays.

In 2011 I went to my 10 year high school reunion and realized that I am right now in the prime of my life… even if I can’t fit into my old cheer skirt, or even my wedding dress. Right now is the best. The greatest lesson I learned in 2011 is to stop waiting for life to happen. Be happy in your little duplex, even if your cougar neighbor has a more exciting life than you! Be happy that your daughter is into everything, she is healthy and happy. Be happy that Dylan is two because he will be three soon and then 18. Be happy your husband has a job… period. Just be happy, it is truly a choice and a choice I gladly made in 2011. As I smile on twenty eleven I feel a sense of gratitude and I have joy in knowing that all of my blessing came from God himself and then I smile bigger when I realize that he will be coming with me to 2012.

Plums 1st Birthday!

Noel turns one today, at 4:51 pm to be exact. It’s crazy to think that a year ago I was in the hospital waiting to meet my baby girl. I remember wanting to be as prepared as possible; I wanted her to be able look back on her baby pictures without thinking her mom looked like a wreck or that she had just given birth for that matter. I know Dylan won’t care, he might not even look at his pictures, but I have a feeling Noel will. So I got a pink mani/pedi, I woke up early to do my make-up, and throughout my labor I applied lip gloss. I know this was a frivolous concern to have in a time like labor, but to me I felt as if I was about to meet the Queen of England. My feelings were spot on; Noel now rules our home with a tiny iron fist.


It turned out that Noel’s labor was quick and painless… though the six months following weren’t. Just as Dylan embarked on the terrible two’s I gave birth to the loudest (but sweetest and cutest) crying kid one could imagine. Looking back, I think it might have been exhaustion, but at the time I thought she cried non- stop! It’s all very foggy, but at one point I felt homesick for the hospital… those nurses took such good care of us and the hospital had cable. Plum and I would catch up on shows and it was just like a mini vay-kay!

A year later, and six months of actually sleeping through the night, I have found new perspective. The first thing I learned was that you never know who you are going to get. You can dream up whoever you want, but God has dreamed up someone better. Children come with their own spirits, dispositions and surprises. Some things about my Plum cake that really surprise me are…

• She walks very well & very fast. She has mastered the art of running away when she gets caught with her “hand in the cookie jar”.

• She amuses herself. She keeps very busy by making huge messes and trying to eat inedible things like drywall and dust particles floating in a ray of sunlight.

• She startles easy so when you catch her, she jumps and runs while giggling.

• She snores, which is really cute.

• She loves getting into my make-up (my tools) and I love that she wants to be with me while I’m getting ready.

• She refuses to eat baby food. She wants to eat what her brother is eating.

• She loves Mickey Mouse. She lights up when she hears his voice.

• She growls when she’s mad

• She loves Dylan and laughs at him, which encourages his behavior!

• She takes 1 nap a day which is sometimes less than 45 minutes. (AAAAAAHHH)

• She will find a way to get dirty in 5 minutes while her brother can look spotless for days.

• She doesn’t want to cuddle; she wants to go go go.

• She is a Ma ma’s girl and I love that.

• She is shy with new people

• She wants to do everything herself…like brush her hair & teeth. She wants to feed herself and take her own diaper off. Cute & frustrating!

• She sleeps through the night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

• She hates going to bed, baby food, getting out of the bath, getting her diaper changed, and being hungry or should I say not being completely full.

• She loves jewelry, music, shoes, chocolate, trying to stand on her head, bouncing, climbing on her brothers bed and bouncing some more, wrestling with dad, taking bubble baths, her glow worm, and being chased.



But the biggest surprise is how we ever lived without her. Noel fills our home with her own special light. She truly was sent from up above. Happy Birthday Plum we are so grateful you were born.

True Love

The other night I could not get Dylan to bed. He barely had one nap so I knew he was tired, but he resisted with all his might. I couldn’t understand what he needed. He was fed, bathed, teeth were brushed, stories were read, he had his blanket, glow worm and thousands of kisses. He would wave goodnight as I closed the door and just when I thought the night was mine I would hear little footsteps followed by a tiny voice saying “mommy, buzz” as in Buzz light year. After the tenth time I gave in. It was late and we were both tired, but I didn’t have any more energy to put him back to bed. We sat on the couch, Dylan watching Toy Story and me watching him because that is cuter than the movie itself. Soon enough I heard the door unlock and to both of our relief Dad was home. When Corbet came through the door our Cub got off the couch, with blanket in tow, and slowly scuffed over to his Dad. I watched in amazement as Corbet picked Dylan up. The little boy in footed pajama’s who had fought sleep all night simply put his head on his Dad’s shoulder and in seconds fell asleep. I then understood that Dylan didn’t need his glow worm or his blanket, or maybe even my kisses. What he needed was his Dad and from the looks of it, his Dad needed him too. It’s funny how he can be naughty (he’s 2) all day, I mean this kid can really test me, but a moment like that can erase it all. I was tired; we all were, but that moment was not lost on me. I was looking at Corbet and Dylan thinking… this is what true love is.

I’m Grateful …
For caramel… it is so GOOD! Whoever invented it… I owe you one!
For living in the land of opportunity
For the ability to laugh everyday
For good music
For Pinterest (I don’t have to cut out pictures in magazines and glue them in my journal anymore!!!)

The Transfer

Dylan and Noel share a room; it is one of the awesome perks of living in a duplo. But, we can’t put them to bed in the same room because plum will see her brother and bounce around her crib all night. She is her brother’s biggest fan, even though he doesn’t share. Because of our amazing living circumstances we put Noel to bed in our room. This allows her to cry it out without disturbing the neighbors. What can I say it’s a win win. Cub gets to sleep cuddling his glow worn and cars while Plum exercises her opinion in another room.

There is one thing about this situation that I just love. It is what Corbet and I call “the transfer”. When Corbet gets home from work at night he takes Plum from our room to hers. There are few things that warm my heart more than seeing my husband so gently pick up our sugar plum, rock her, kiss her and look at her as if he has never seen anything so beautiful. He doesn’t rush “the transfer”; I can tell it’s the best part of his day. It doesn’t matter how tired he is or how ready for bed he is, the transfer is sacred.

Kung Fu grip on that bottle...

Our Sweet Sugar Plum
Gratitude
· I got to talk to my cousin today
· We carved pumpkins
· Corbet took Dylan to play for a few hours
· Plum is feeding herself (though she thinks everything is edible)
· Halloween is on Monday!
· I love teaching the 12 & 13 year old girls at church
· At the moment my house is clean
· Christmas is coming!

The Red Luggage

In my eighteen year old mind I could not understand the desire my mom had for red luggage. In the Peterson home it was a regular topic of conversation. There was no mystery about what mom wanted for Christmas and Santa Dennis (my dad) delivered. My mom was so happy; you would have thought a free trip came with that luggage. To my mom the red luggage represented a world of possibilities. She dreamed of taking this luggage on cruises and trips, adventure was calling. After all, her youngest (me) was about to graduate high school and leave for college… her and my dad were free! As always my mom was prepared; she had the luggage tags filled out and a pretty ribbon tied around the handle for easy identification at the airport. Needless to say my mom was ready for a vacation and we all knew she deserved it.

The time came for me to leave for college. To my parent’s surprise (and mine) I chose a college across the country. The night before we were to leave for Virginia I was a mess… I was trying to cram all my belongings into an old suitcase. I was so afraid I’d get there and then find I forgot something I needed. That is what I told myself anyway but the truth was I was afraid I’d get there and realize I still needed my parents. Was I a big enough girl to be on my own? I’m sure my mom saw right through my façade, but instead of telling me so she wheeled in her brand new, never been used, beloved red luggage. She smiled and said, “I want you to take this to college”.

I will never forget that moment. I felt two distinct feelings: One, I didn’t deserve this luggage and two, she did. To both of us that luggage represented adventure and she was handing me her adventure. Though I was eighteen and at times selfish, her sacrifice was not lost on me. Her and my Dad had worked hard so that I could go to college and now she is giving me her luggage to do it. We made it to Virginia and once I was all settled in my parents had to leave. I have not forgotten my parent’s faces as they were leaving. I could tell that they were as nervous to leave me as I was for them to leave. Nevertheless, college was a hit and true to the late bloomer I am, I hit my stride.

“The red” and I went on many adventures and weekend trips (some the rents didn’t know about… some they did). It took me back home many times. I took the red on my most beloved mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It came with me on my honeymoon and even to the hospital for the birth of my first child.

When I look back at some of the best moments of my life, I got there holding my mom’s red luggage and in essence I was holding my mom. My mom couldn’t be with me in college, on my mission or my honeymoon (definitely not my honeymoon), but she sent her luggage. I never stopped thinking of “The Red” as my mom’s luggage because I knew in my heart that it belonged to her, but she gave it to me so willingly and with the hope that I would have my own adventures.

Sunday Antics

On the Sunday’s that Corbet works I take the kids to church all by myself. This has proven a worthy challenge. I start mentally preparing by Wednesday. I start to envision getting the kids and myself ready and getting there on time which is at 9:00. Though, I have yet to make it on time on these Sunday’s it gives me something to work for. I try to be as prepared as possible. I pack the diaper bag the night before. I try to anticipate what Dylan will need; toy cars, a Sippy cup, a book and cookies for when I need something to bribe him with. I see the other mom’s bring healthy snacks and I try to do the same when Corbet is with me because his influence is enough to keep Dylan behaved, but when I am a lone reed I resort to bribery. (I’m not ashamed) Besides from packing the diaper bag, I lay out our clothes, bathe the kids the night before and prepare for a very simple breakfast.

Managing a two year old and infant at church for three hours has taught me to wear flats (yuck), tie my hair my back (not cute) and wear a long enough skirt so that when I bend over church goes don’t see London or France. Why flats you ask? Well I am no athlete, but I have learned that chasing a runaway Cub down the halls of the Lord’s house while holding Plum my catching time is best in flats!

The most challenging part of the whole day is getting the kids in and out of the car in one piece. Dylan loves to see me freak out when he puts his hands on dirty cars and wipes them on his clean slacks. Once we are in Church I can breathe a little. Today, we got to church at about 9:10 (our time in improving!) and we sat down in the very back row. That is another thing; I don’t try to a hero and sit close to the front. So anyway, we got there and things were going really good. Noel was content in her car seat and Dylan was sitting on my lap. Just as I was started to feel proud of myself (never a good idea) Noel burst into tears and Dylan takes off. I fumble to get Noel out of her car seat while I see the back of Dylan’s head getting smaller and smaller. By the time I get a hold of Noel, Dylan is up on the stand with the Bishop. When I go get him he starts laughing as do some of the congregation. I put on my patient mother face (which is all show), grab his hand and begin the long trek back to the nose bleed section where we belong. The rest of the first hour was a little fuzzy. I got the cookies out, took Dylan to the foyer for a little time out (so he could play with the water fountain) and managed to keep Noel from wanting to eat (which really is a modern day miracle). By the time Sacrament meeting was over, I was ready to pack the kids up and call it a day. I leaned to the mom sitting next to me, who also has a two year old and said, “I get why some churches send the kids to nursery even during the service, I think they are on to something.”

After the first meeting I take Dylan to Nursery for two hours so I can go to Sunday school and Relief Society. Usually he causes a big scene when I leave, which is pay back from my days of Pre-School (sorry Mrs. Pots and Mrs. Mole), but today he found a friend and trains and I was out the door. I still take Plum to both of my classes, but she is cake compared to Cub. Today she has unusually loud gas, which is uncomfortable for both of us. I don’t want to throw her under the bus and point to her when she relieves herself, but I don’t want to take the blame either! Between class and a few trips to the mothers lounge to feed and change Noel time went pretty fast. By the time I got Dylan from Nursery and got to the car, I was so exhausted! This may not sound like much and believe me a lot of women do it with more kids, but I am a big baby and for me taking my ankle biters to church wears me out.

Today when we got home I fed them both and put them down for a nap. I couldn’t decide if I wanted a nap or to just enjoy the quiet … so I sat on the couch and pondered the reasons I take my kids to church when for the most part it seems like a big chore. As always I found more reasons to go than to stay home. I am trusting that the Lord knows my struggle and that he will bless me. I have faith that though my children are small, little seeds of faith are being planted in their heart. I also can’t lie, I pretend that Nursery is free babysitting and that the mothers lounge is a club where Mom’s can hang out and exchange tips (which is true). I also learn something every Sunday. Even with my noisy offspring I never go home empty. If there is one place where I feel understood, it is church because most of the women have done just what I have done and most times with more kids and then there is The Lord who never forgets our sacrifice, even if sometimes we forget his.

For more information where you can take your noisy kids to church go to http://www.mormon.org/
 
Gratitude:
• My parents and Grandma came to visit! They brought Dylan a Cars Table & Toy Box! He is one happy kid!


• We had a great weekend that involved the farmers market, a wiener dog race, a BBQ with the rents and Church of course!

• The weather has been beautiful!

• The flowers I got at the farmers market are holding up beautifully.

• Our neighbor’s party (huge party) only lasted until 12:30 last night. We thought it would be until at least 3:00. I saw him after church and though I was exhausted; I know I felt better than him today!